No more paperclips
Well, I guess it eventually had to happen, but I’ve run out of paperclips. My case manager had suggested when I received my referral that I pull together a large number of paperclips (well over one hundred) and move one aside per day that I have waited to travel. They’re all gone.
I really never believed that I’d move the last clip over. Notwithstanding my previous posts about trying to be optimistic, I really thought I would travel before I got even close to the last one (I mean, the number of clips represented not only the average time between referral and travel for my province, but also a significant buffer). I had hoped that the buffer would’ve covered the delay caused by this new I-600 procedure (not announced when I received my referral). Clearly, that was not the case. In fact, it probably wasn’t even close.
So, I find myself caught in a dilemma. As we all know, those of us involved in international adoption seem to engage in two fairly obsessive behaviors – blogging and counting. It’s true, there’s even a t-shirt at Cafe Press about the blogging. And don’t pretend you don’t know where you are in your wait for a referral or I-600 approval, you know you do (and if you didn’t count for the referral, you will for your I-600 approval). I have my blog, so I’m set on that piece, but now that my clips are gone, what do I use for my countdown while awaiting approval? I don’t really want to add more paperclips. The paperclips made me happy. I feel like I would taint them if they were associated with this last wait.
I need something tangible, something I can place on my desk at work, that I can dispose of once per day. Instead of simply moving them from one side of my notice board to the other, I’ve decided that this time I’m going to completely eliminate these reminders of the final countdown in this process. I’ve internalized everything else, why not this?
I’m thinking of using those Cadbury creme eggs. Sure, there’s the symbolism of the egg, of course, but more importantly, I would get to eat one of them every day that I wait. Even better – since I’ve already knocked off a few days on this last 60 day clock, I would get to eat one for each of those days, too. Ok, the concept of that particular binge is making me kind of queasy, but you get the picture. Not exactly paperclips, but perhaps the right choice for this stage. I mean, the photo alone is fairly nauseating. What could be more appropriate?
Moderately green mommy
So, I’ve decided to give these gDiapers a shot. They’re almost a hybrid of a cotton diaper and a disposable. The outer layer is cloth, but it has an inner liner that can be taken out and flushed.
I first read about them in Vanity Fair last fall, where Julia Roberts mentioned she was using them for her youngest child. If only the actually had a photo of Ms. Roberts flushing the inner liner with the special stick the company provides. Would’ve been priceless.
I also decided to go with glass bottles. I’ve been bothered by the reports of chemicals leaching from plastic bottles (although I have no idea what the health implications of this are), and again I don’t like the idea of continually using the disposable liners (convenient as they may be and as lazy as I am). I’m also thinking of buying either those silicone Siliskins or the Wee-Go bottles. Both are pricey (Siliskins are a bit cheaper, but less convenient since you need to buy the bottles separately – BUT, you can get Wee-Gos at scandinucci for $3 off per bottle right now), but I am fairly clumsy at times and even though Evenflow says the glass is safe, I’m still a bit concerned about breakage.
Shopping Assistance
Hello everyone! I haven’t been here for a while, but that was because I was sulking while our friends in HCMC were wading through other applications before confirming receipt of my I-600. Now that I’m able to count down the days on the 60 day meter (and I hope lots of you can, too, or have actually been approved!), I’ve decided I need to get serious about some shopping.
Since it’s been many many months since my referral, I’ve actually accumulated quite a few items for Oscar – you know, all of the cute / stylish / fun ones. Unfortunately for me, I’ve kept the most difficult shopping decision for last. I truly cannot decide which formula I should use. Do I use the premium (super expensive ones) because I’m afraid that I won’t be giving the best option to my child (which, I’m sure is exactly what these formula makers want us to believe)? Or, do I use the store brands (Costco, Target, etc.)? From what I understand, the major difference is how finely the formula is ground (resulting in a smoother beverage for the more sophisticated palate). The core contents of the formulas themselves are federally regulated, but that leaves the additives, which are not. Are those in Similac / Enfamil that much better than those in the much cheaper brands?
The odd thing here is that I’m not a penny pincher. I splurge when I think a brand is superior to another. I do, however, hate to be a fool and taken advantage of and I really hate to be manipulated into believing that I’m doing someone harm (whether it’s myself, my dog, or now, my son).
After the brand decision, I’m going to have to come up with a decision on whether to use organic formula and what do I want added into the formula (ARA / DHA I take are a must). Any advice on any of these things?
Easier questions:
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how many crib sheets do I need?
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where can I find plain white diapers (all of the diapers I have purchased have some sort of cutesy design – worst case is the Winnie the Pooh design, ugh)?
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is there anything wrong with using those Avent bottles with the disposable liners long term or do people simply use them for traveling?
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how many pairs of pyjamas do I need, or should I simply use those sleep sacks?
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any recommendations on baby sunscreen?
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do I need to wash all of Oscar’s clothes in Dreft or some other baby detergent before he wears them?
Any assistance (from the BTDTs and the first timers muddling through this with me) is much appreciated.
For Sarah
Healthier, huh?
Haven’t been able to even get online for days, since I’ve been trying to get a huge deal signed. I’ve been in the office since (no joke) Saturday morning. I mean, I have not left the office since then, and the earliest I might even have a chance at getting out is 5:00 am tomorrow (open of market, when we might announce this deal). The amazing thing is that it’s not even bothering me that I have billed 90 hours in four days and that I have had six hours sleep in the same amount of time.
Why, you ask? Probably two reasons. First, this is one of those career-making deals, which is great, since it’s coming before I go on leave and the preliminary partnership decision for me will occur while I’m out. More importantly, though, this is the last time I’m going to do this. I will not be able to ever do this again. It’s kind of liberating. Lots of people in my firm simply refuse to do all-nighters, and I’m going to become one of them. Very nice thought.
By the way, the no sugar or other unhealthy foods thing is over. I have lived on nothing but pizza (one is being delivered as I type), Thai food, scones from Starbucks and treats from the vending maching (compliments of the partner on the deal). Not a good week food-wise.
Still optimistic
Strangely enough, the more I try to find a positive spin on things, the easier it gets. AND, something fairly nice happened the other day. I got word that the paperwork my agency needed to file my I-600 is on its way from the province to my case manager. I was able to complete my I-600, and while I don’t think it will be filed anytime sooner than two weeks from now, at least I’m getting closer. Perhaps it will even get logged in before Tet! We’ll see. . .
Optimism
I’ve decided to start the year off with a new perspective. I’m no longer going to think about the fact that half of Oscar’s clothes will be too small for him whenever I pick him up, I’m thinking of the fact that I can donate all of the smaller clothes I bought to either the orphanage or a local charity. Instead of whining about the fact that I thought I’d be on maternity leave by now, I’m reminding myself that the delay just means that I might be on leave during the spring instead of the winter, which isn’t all bad. Instead of counting the seemingly never-ending days of this wait, I’m thinking about the fact that now that I’ve paid my fees, I can watch my savings account slowly tick back to where it was a few months ago. And, instead of obsessing over when my agency will send a new picture, I’m encouraging myself to believe that the fact that I haven’t seen a new photo in 11 weeks gives me the opportunity to be excited all over again when I do get one, since there’s no way he’ll look anything like he did three months ago.
I don’t know how long this new perspective thing will last, but I’m hoping to make it at least a week. Yes, I know that’s quite pathetic, but if you knew me, you’d understand that even typing the word “optimism” was a giant leap. And, by the way, the photo is not of me.
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Etta’s Hats
Where I’ve Been
