Archaeology with Oscar*

*Guest Blogger Oscar

My mom woke me up at the butt-crack of dawn because she wanted to see a bunch of old buildings over by the ocean.  She made me to go to breakfast at 7:00 am, even though she knows I need to have my first breakfast first before my official breakfast and she didn’t even give me any Cheerios first.  So after we went to the restaurant and I refused to eat (duh), she made me get into a taxi (which she knows I HATE) to drive to some place called Tulum.

We got there a long, long time later and there was this cool tram thing that we rode in for a few minutes, but then I had to get into the stroller so we could go to something everyone kept calling the ruins.  I didn’t understand the name, since I hadn’t been there before, so I couldn’t have ruined it.  I’m sure I’m going to get blamed for it, though. My mom pushed me in the stroller for a while up a bunch of hills through a jungle and then we got out in the open and I didn’t want to sit in the stroller anymore, so I yelled “DA”.  My mom just looked at me and pointed at this building and told me how old it was and stuff.  Okay, whatever, lady.  I just told her “DA” again and she pointed at some plants.  C’mon, what’s the problem, woman?  I gave her fair warning with a third “DA” and when she went to put me in the stroller, I just told her no (you know, by screaming and arching my back).  Then I decided to just sit down.  Try to get around that, woman.

Looks like she’s going to try to call my bluff, so I think I’ll pour on the tears.  She’ll have to carry me out of here if I’m hurt.  See, MaMA, my leg and my thumb are hurt (you remember, I cut my thumb last month).  They hurt really bad right now.  I think it might have something to do with the 97 degree heat with 95% humidity. 

Holy crap.  Mean mommy doesn’t even care that I’m hurt.  She just kissed my owwies and told me to walk some more or get in the stroller.

Okay, she had to pick me up to carry me up the new set of hills.  Mom says it’s beautiful.  Um, what?  Do you see what I’m seeing?  Seriously?  I don’t like this at all and I make that clear.  Mom explains the guys on the right are just playing, but they’re obviously going to try to push me off the cliff.  And what are these crazy people doing?  Mom says they’re praying to a Mayan sun god.  None of this is right.  None of it.  Get me out of here.  NOW.

Mom at least is carrying me now most of the time, but I’m still not happy.  At all.  And why did those old people just tell mom that “they rarely continue to act this way when they get to the second grade?”  I think they were talking about me. What does she know about any of this stuff? 

Mom says she’s going to find something special just for me.  I’m skeptical, but I’ve decided to give her the benefit of the doubt for a bit.  And, get this, she scored!  Look at this guy! Mom got him to jump around and even to run towards us a little.  It was pretty awesome.  After that mom said she wanted to take this one picture, so I let her, and then we hiked all the way down the hills again to get the stroller.  Mom said she was surprised that it was still there, but why would anyone want that thing?  Then I told mom I was thirsty and she looked at me funny, and we went into this one store where mom griped about spending $5 for a Coke.

After that, we went back to the taxi.  Mom seemed to think that we were going shopping, but after a couple of stops at stores I made it clear that that was not going to happen.  We just went back to the hotel to go swimming, which is what we should have been doing all day anyway.

December 11, 2009 - Posted by Oscar and Etta's mom | Oscar, travel, vacations